My darling Gumball has decided to take a break from napping. For a week. I thought it was over, because she napped yesterday, but no. No nap again today. She plays, happily, and cries, unhappily, in her crib. It's awful. I brought her to the doctor. Nothing wrong. Nana laughed at me, because in her opinion, Gumball is completely fine, just acting like a normal, bratty two year old. She's like a tiny, drunk tyrant: irrational, emotional, prone to fits of laughter and tears. Completely unable to be satisfied. Terrible. It really is wrenching when your kid wants something, and is miserable, and also has no way to articulate what she wants. Lila has a huge vocabulary, but she is no where near being able to say how she feels. Very frustrating.
I went out with E two more times. Dates 5 and 6. She's lovely. We have a great time together. She likes me. And I am... scared. I don't really know what I'm supposed to do. I don't want to be hurt again. I don't want to hurt her either. I know, I know. Take it day by day. I am doing that. But I am also worrying about literally everything else that I could possibly worry about. And then there's Gumball. When do I let them meet? I am very conflicted about everything. Wish there were some answers out there.
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